By Alex Garver
the pendulum swings from 'White is good' to 'White is bad' and back again the crowd cheering and jeering in jest rhythmic oscillations of duality hypnotize me into a trance of separation that flattens fractal dimensions into cookie-cutout identities so simple and sweet my holy longing is hijacked in addiction chips of histories, bittersweet trails of tears, frozen streaks stain the land that would sustain me who was pained and who awakens in the morning light with warm skin and peppery cacao? what perceptions pin reality like a tiger caught beneath a fallen tree? may I, dare we, walk free? like a dancing leaf— apparent personality fed and moved by cosmic breath, still grounded exhaling into the Earth. perhaps it is time we learn with humility how the melting glacier's death gives birth to the sun's shimmerings on an alpine lake. my prayer today and for this age is to not judge others by the color of their skin by the shape of their identity not even by their awareness or lack thereof I forgive us our flailing grabs at love our entitled wounds demanding address our inconsiderate raping of women and Earth our domination and killing of innocent people because I know the pain who writes the script and the lonely actor who loses himself for the sake of adoration I too have killed for love. I have mistaken sex for worthiness. I have manipulated the vulnerable and abused my power to prevent lack and aloneness from annihilating myself. And I also sense the end of this story the dark void might dissolve myself but it is no end that is not also the beginning the very thing I most feared is what I have most sought in eons of disconnection and confusion fear in its repulsion and desire in its outflow point the way through opposites craving and aversion arise from the same still point of mind. sit still my child and know you are Go unknowable perhaps but knowing unknowing allows knowing of all in accepting our trials and my old karmic tries for Self I do not condone or allow others to harm myself or my friends I stand, I fight, I cry, I sing for truth for freedom for presence for love life after life I swim for the shore not just for myself but for all of my selves for you, your mother, and our child interlocking, interweaving forms filled with love like Mozart's notes, different and connected, downloaded, bit by bit, like a Zip drive from the source of all things. I know not who I am or who you are And yet I know who we are not. I am not deceived nor so intoxicated with form to lose awareness of play arising from spacious nothing Nor am I so enamored with my own religion that I cease to enjoy the ecstatic flow of mystery in and through the world. I hope to join you again one day under a starry sky or in song around a campfire or tending to the wounds of war It matters not so much where or when we meet or on which dusty road we fall in love I only hope we remember our connection inherent in the One who dreams...
Alex Garver
:: Contributing Author ::
Alex has a degree in psychology, survived a kundalini awakening, and ordained as a Buddhist monk in Thailand. He now uses Alchemical Hypnotherapy to help people recognize patterns, transmute fear, and live joyously from the heart.
Website: alexgarver.com
Email: alexgarver@gmail.com